The Fruitcake Dilemma with Ferris Bueller's Fruitcake Recipe

So are you a fruit cake lover? Do you make fruit cake, buy fruit cake or is it given to you by the same people every year? I have never made it or a fan of the dense, sticky sweet cake but there are people who like it and make it every year. I have a few days left of my 30 Days of Christmas goodies and thought it would be fun to share this story with you below and Ferris Bueller's Fruitcake recipe. 

Janis Thomas

The Fruitcake Dilemma
By Janis Thomas,
Author of Sweet Nothings

We've all heard the jokes about fruitcake:

There is only one fruitcake in the world and it keeps getting re-gifted.
There is no such thing as a good fruitcake.Fruitcake is the perfect gift to give someone you hate.

Personally, I try not to be prejudiced against any particular kind of cake. I consider myself an equal-opportunity baker. I'm not crazy about coconut, yet I force myself to keep an open mind regarding German Chocolate cake. Pineapple Upside-down Cake is a complete mystery to me, however, I refrain from making snarky comments about people who adore it. But I do understand why fruitcake gets a bad rap. I mean, really. Disgusting. How can you possibly say anything good about a cake that looks like road-kill and smells like the floor of a crowded movie theater? In my novel, SWEET NOTHINGS, my main character compares people with desserts, and whenever she comes across someone she can't stand, she labels them fruitcake. Readers instantly know what this person is all about.

Years ago, I was asked to make a fruitcake for a celebrity play reading in which this awful sweet treat was featured. And my fruitcake was supposed to be a thank-you gift to the star. I don't want to name drop here, but let's just say that I couldn't possibly allow Ferris Bueller to eat anything offensive. He was, after all, the subject of many of my pubescent fantasies. So I undertook to create the most delicious fruitcake in the history of mankind, despite the fact that 'delicious fruitcake' is an oxymoron.

This was before Google, so I couldn't simply type 'yummy fruitcake' into the search bar -- not that 'yummy fruitcake' would have pulled up many hits. So I dragged all of my cookbooks out and laid them on my kitchen table and proceeded to pore over recipes, gagging my way through the lists of ingredients, and doing my best to overcome nausea as I perused pictures.

Finally, I realized that the only way to please Ferris Bueller was to think outside the box, or in this case, outside the holiday tin. And I came up with a plan. I used one of my standby, melt-in-your-mouth pound cake recipes and shucked the maraschino cherries for more palatable dried fruit. It was easy enough to do, and you can do it too.

ferris bueller

Ferris Bueller's Fruitcake

You will need:

Your favorite vanilla pound cake recipe
A Bundt pan
Two cups of the following: dried cherries, dried cranberries, dried apricots (chopped) dried blueberries, etc.

One cup candied pecans
One teaspoon cinnamon
Dried apples and cherries for garnish (optional)


Mix all ingredients together, except for garnish, and place in prepared Bundt pan, then bake to recipe specifications until a toothpick comes out clean. 
If you wish, place dried apples and cherries around top of cake. 
Let cool completely, wrap in parchment paper or cellophane, place in holiday tin, and voila!

I never did get to hear what Ferris thought of my fruitcake, but when I met him (major thrill!) and presented him with the tin, I was able to tell him, with complete confidence, that this was one fruitcake he could actually eat.

You may not be giving your fruitcake to a celebrity, but the praise you'll get when your loved one tastes this delectable cake will make you feel like a star.
© 2013 Janis Thomas, author of Sweet Nothings

Recipe and article provided by Author Janis Thomas, who is the author of Sweet Nothings, is a native Californian, lives in Orange County with her husband, their two children, and their dog, Ruby. Janis has written more than fifty songs and (with her dad) two children's books, and is also an avid baker. She is also the author of Something NewFor more information please visit and you can also find her on Twitter and Facebook. 

Check below for my list of 30 Days of Christmas Goodies and Cookie Recipes! There is something for everyone!

holiday desserts

More Cookie Recipes, Holiday Drinks, and Christmas Goodies

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